Tag Archives: single

5 Ways For Singles to Have a Jolly Holiday

If you dread the holidays because you’re not sharing them with a significant other, it’s time to change your mind about the season and seize the opportunities that are unique to this time of year. Who knows, your best gift might be that special someone stepping under your mistletoe. So get out and participate in the fun and rejoice in your freedom and availability to take on new terrain.

  1. Give gifts of time: Lots of charitable organizations ramp up their services during the holidays and it’s a great time to get involved. With the economic slump, help is needed now more than ever. A few years ago I volunteered as a waitress at a Christmas Dinner served to hundreds of my local community’s homeless and met dozens of great people. The spirit of the event added to the quick comradarie between us as a team working for a good cause. What better icebreaker than rolling up your sleeves and digging into a job along side an interesting stranger? The win/win: meet someone or not, you’ll feel great to make a contribution to society.
  2. Party anyone? Cocktail parties abound this time of year and they’re a great excuse to get dressed up and put your best foot forward into festive gatherings. Arriving solo or with other single friends gives you freedom to mix and mingle as you please. The season itself is perfect food for fodder. Striking up a conversation about best Christmas memories or favorite New Year’s past times can tell you a lot about a new acquaintance. Learning about how a person’s family celebrates Hanukkah or Kwanza, shows interest and makes conversation easy… everyone’s got a good story to tell.
  3. Lose the Scrooge and consider travel delays an opportunity. If holiday travel has you stuck in a jammed airport waiting for a blizzard to pass around the holidays, don’t despair. Look around! There are plenty of other single travelers out there who might just enjoy a little company during the wait and have had it with talking on their cell phone to pass the time. Grab a Peppermint Coffee at Starbucks and find out if that fruitcake meets carry-on requirements.
  4. Warm up with a winter escape. Storybook holiday gatherings with the family are a reality for some, but not all of us. If getting together with family is a happy fun experience, go for it and enjoy! But if you’d honestly rather watch a TV marathon of Twilight Zone, you might want to consider a getaway instead. Head to the mountains with other single friends and hit the slopes. Park City, Utah; Jackson Hole, Wyoming; Winter Park, Colorado; Mammoth, California; Killington, Vermont; Sugarloaf, Maine and Lake Tahoe, California all have resorts for singles and score high ratings with TheSkiChannel.com. Apres-ski at the base lodge, sip your Mocha Nog Punch and take notice, you are far from being the only single in town!
  5. Try sippin’ pretty in a warm, sunny spot. If your idea of a White Christmas is digging your toes in white sand, hit the beach to mingle with other singles. And while kicking back with warm sunshine isn’t all Bing Crosby-ish, it’s a great way to celebrate the holidays. Nostalgic dreams of sleigh rides quickly dissipate when you try your skills at surfing or kayaking and commune with nature. Expand your horizons with adventure travel groups specifically for singles. Sharing a soul-enriching active vacation is a great way to ring in the New Year.

Whatever you do, wherever you go, embrace the holidays. Whether you’re going to a tree lighting ceremony, a winter festival or just heading out to buy a turkey to cook for your family, holiday spirit makes people friendlier and more approachable. The festive nature of the season makes it easier to start up conversation. Seize the moment, don’t be shy… “it’s the most wonderful time of the year.”

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Filed under Holidays, Inspiration, The Single Life, Top Five

Let it Snow

Ah. The fire’s burning, the snow is falling and I’m about to make latkes….I’m definitely in a holiday sort of mood. Of course, the snow is falling on this blog (thanks to WordPress cool-ness!) and not outside my Tampa, Florida home. And the fire that’s burning is actually a candle. And I’m even thinking of baking my latkes, which is definitely a sin! Even if you’re taking short cuts like I am, though, how can you think about anything but the holidays right now?

I’ve made lists, changed lists, crossed off and added to my lists, and I’ve spent my fair share of time shopping. In fact, I came across something interesting the other day while taking a break from Cyber-Monday shopping.

An online dating company reported that the #1 holiday gift for single people is a date.

You see, they did a survey and found that more than 50% of single people polled would rather have someone to kiss on New Year’s Eve than a new computer as a holiday gift.

I find it interesting that the choice was between someone to kiss and a computer, because what you’ve seen me write more than once (okay, a lot more than once), is that single people should get away from their computers and look for connections in the real world. But yes, I do agree that there are plenty of single people out there who would prefer a nice relationship to whatever thoughtful gift you might find on one of your shopping sprees.

So, how about this–why not give your favorite single person the gift of Greenlighting?  Go to GreenlightCard.com, click on Gift Giver, and you’ll see that we have gift cards that allow you to buy a membership as a gift. And if I do say so myself, you’ll be impressed with the beautiful card you get, ready to personalize and give to your friend or family member who really would be better off with someone to snuggle with than a leopard-print Snuggie.

I say, buy Greenlight Cards as a gift for…

…your son, who just can’t seem to meet Mr. Right,

…your friend, who is slowly, but surely, recovering from her divorce,

…your sweet, but kinda shy, co-worker.

So check out the Gift Giver page, cross someone off your list and then let me know…who did you buy Greenlight Cards for?

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Filed under Gift Giving, Greenlighting

You Go, Then I’ll Go…Reflecting on The Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear

If you’re a loyal reader, you know that our Greenlight Card staff headed to Washington, D.C. last weekend to join hundreds of thousands of people at the Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear.

We went for several reasons:

  • Fun
  • Inspiration
  • A sense of community
  • Fun
  • The chance to talk about the attraction of “like-minded” people
  • Fun

We found all the things we went looking for, and the great music and well-orchestrated show turned out to be a bonus.

We started the weekend on Friday night with a meetup at Co Co. Sala.  I’ll write a separate blog post on that, but in order to avoid keeping you in suspense I’ll tell you now that it was a great venue, a fun evening and also rather productive —we watched two couples pair up and head out the door to continue getting to know each other outside the group. Ahh, our inner yentas were satisfied…but more than that, we were thrilled to meet such interesting, sincere, down-to-earth people.

And the next day was the rally. At the end of the rally, Jon Stewart had his “moment of sincerity”—during which he basically asked Washington, D.C. and the news media to play nice, and reminded the crowd that most of us do that every day of our lives. “You go, then I’ll go,” said Stewart. “That’s what we do every damn day!”

He went on to explain, with no political proselytizing whatsoever, that we’re all on a metaphoric highway and even if we don’t like the bumper sticker or the aggressive behavior of the car in front of us, we pause for a minute and then say once again, “you go, then I’ll go.”  To truly appreciate this message, listen to him tell it in his own words.

But why I am writing about this in a dating blog?

Because “you go, then I’ll go” applies to relationships, too. And even to the stage that comes before the relationship–meeting people and choosing to date them. We all need to be open minded and accepting because sticking to preconceived ideas of what our “type” looks like and acts like is way too limiting.

Let people into your life, give them a turn, see if they might be a fit after all.

And once you’re in a relationship, be willing to compromise. Admittedly, this gets a lot harder as you get older and more set in your routines, but love is a great incentive to give a little–and get a lot!

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Filed under DC Single Meetup, Inspiration, meetup, Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear

Awkward Encounters

Just the other day, Village Voice blogger Leslie Minora called dating calling cards an example of the way “the Internet dating world keeps one-upping itself with newfangled ways to have awkward encounters with strangers.”

Ouch!  That hurts, especially since the whole idea behind Greenlight Cards is to avoid awkward encounters.  I mean, what’s more awkward than trying to find the words to let someone know you’re interested in getting to know them better?  The words always sound smooth and natural in your head but often don’t come out that way, if they come out at all.  And asking outright means at least one of you will feel awkward if the interest is one-sided.

Thanks to a well-placed exclamation point, the sarcasm practically oozes off the screen when Leslie later says that the receiver of a dating calling card can “start conversation that can, ideally, lead to a perfect match!”

Here’s the thing–online dating sites are drawing millions of people in with the idea of finding their perfect match online.  We don’t think anyone’s perfect, but we absolutely understand the desire to meet “the one.”  The one who doesn’t try to be perfect but is just right for you.  The one you want to make happy and vice versa.  And why couldn’t “the one” be sitting in your favorite coffee shop or coaching your kid’s soccer team?

Greenlight Cards aren’t about honing in on a perfect match.  They’re about boosting your confidence, providing you with a way to make an impression, and  enabling you to make a promise to yourself to stop letting opportunities pass by without at least seeing what might happen if you put yourself out there a little.  In our “ideal” world, the conversation happens first, then the Greenlight Card, then a date and the chance to see whether the initial attraction you felt might lead to more dates.

Toward the end of Leslie’s blog, you’ll see our videos were deemed “cheesy,” which stung a little.  But then she also posted her favorite*, which is the kind of mixed message that can drive you crazy in a new relationship, right?  (It’s like the person who says “I’m not ready to commit” and then invites you to a family wedding.)

So what do you think about our videos?  I happen to think our touch of “cheese” is quite endearing.  And we’d love to see your own cheesy-or-not video about the challenges of being single.  Send it to us and, as long as it isn’t “inappropriate” in some way (a caveat that’s necessary when it comes to dating), we’ll post it right here and share it with the world.

*By the way, this was Leslie’s favorite video.  What’s yours?

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Filed under No More Excuses, No More Regrets, Offline Dating, Online Dating, The Single Life, video

You’re Not the Only One

When yet another wedding invitation shows up in the mail, it’s easy to feel like you’re the only one who is single.

When you’re the only one at poker night who doesn’t have to check in with his wife to let her know you’re headed home, it’s easy to feel like everyone else is married.

And when you tell friends that you’d love to be introduced to their single friends, only to be faced with blank stares and sympathetic smiles, it’s no wonder you’re ready to believe there are truly no other single people to meet in your town.

But despite how it sometimes feels, CNN reports that you are definitely not the only “singleton” (does anyone else hate that word?) around. In fact, more than 40% of Americans over the age of 18 are single.  That adds up to 96 million people.

And if you’re a single parent who thinks that puts you in a different category, you should know that there are some 11 million single parents living with their children, just like you.

Of course, not being married doesn’t necessarily equate to availability.  The statistics reported by CNN showed that there were more than 6 million households where single people were unmarried but living together–so I guess that means at least 12 million single people aren’t up for grabs.

Still, that leaves a whole lot of people just like you…single.  And many of them are sure to be thinking the same thing.  Where are all the single people?

Now that you know they’re out there, make some plans for the weekend–plans that don’t include your married friends.

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Filed under Advice, Inspiration, No More Excuses, The Single Life

Why We Do What We Do

We started GreenlightCard.com for one reason: to give single people, looking for more than a hook-up, a way to safely share their “dating” contact info with someone. What has come out of our initial concept has been surprising . . . and inspiring. We hear from:

  • Mature people who are uncomfortable with the “starting over” process post-divorce or after losing a partner
  • Gay people who find it challenging to navigate the “Is (s)he or isn’t (s)he?” terrain
  • Busy single parents who are concerned about dating safely when kids are involved
  • Professionals who are not permitted to date co-workers and clients (although those are the only people they ever meet!)
  • Disheartened people who are tired of online dating and hours of sifting through pretentious photos and profiles
  • Men and women who are disappointed and feel de-humanized to find themselves becoming “online shoppers” when all they want is a real connection
  • People who choose to be prepared for romance, in the natural setting of their lives, at the gym, the grocery store, the coffee shop, traveling, etc.

Politely offering your card to someone you feel chemistry with is empowering. It’s also safe, intriguing, effective and a modern move with a retro spin. We all want to be in love. We’re built for it. Greenlight Cards ensure you don’t miss the chance encounter, the double take, the opportunity to connect with meaningful potential when it occurs.

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Filed under Greenlighting

Top 5 Ways To Shake It Up

If you’re complaining about not meeting people and you’re going about life as usual, you’re in trouble.  And deep down, you know it.  You can’t expect something different to happen if you’re living a same-old, same-old life.

And that’s why you’re reading this post…I’m going to give you five ways to shake things up. And they are painless, fun and worth your time.  I promise.

Here’s the most important part to understand—the goal of this exercise isn’t to meet your soul mate.  It’s to change things up and have fun.  The more often you seek out new experiences, the more likely you are to run across someone interesting, and then, well, if you let that person know you think he or she is interesting, you can see where that leads.

When you’re a positive, fun person, you’re a more attractive person.  Attractive people get asked out more often—because they attract other people.  But you knew that, didn’t you?

So here are my top five ways to shake it up:

  1. Throw a party.  You can invite your closest friends if you want, but make it a requirement that they bring someone you don’t know.  That way, the party is half full of new people for you to meet.
  2. Go on vacation.  I know that times are tight and you might not feel like you have money to spend on a vacation.  But whether it’s a day or a weekend or two weeks, get out of your house and spend at least one night someplace different than where you usually lay your head.  Different doesn’t have to be expensive.
  3. Get a new job, find a new way to volunteer or take a new class.  All of these involve group activities, so you’ll get to know new people in the most natural way possible, by working together.
  4. Break a sweat.  Ideally, join a team, but any physical activity works.  Pick a sport, go dancing, or just hit the gym—the post-workout endorphin thing you’ve been hearing about is real.  It will make you feel better.
  5. Join the crowd.  If you read the newspaper, watch the news or go online, you can easily find out where people are going.  So pick something and go.  A protest.  A sports event.  An art opening.  A health fair.  A concert.  Go where other people are going.  You’re there.  They’re there.  At the same place for the same experience.  What an easy way to start a conversation.

If you’ve tried these ideas or have some of your own, spill it in the comments!  In return, I promise some great party ideas in an upcoming post.

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Filed under Advice, Inspiration, The Single Life, Top Five