What have you done for your dating life, lately? If you can’t answer right off the bat, maybe you should start writing it down.
If you’ve ever been on a diet, or read about going on a diet, you know that most experts will tell you to keep a food journal. Writing down what you eat forces you to pay attention. When the log is filled with “good choices,” you feel oh-so-good about yourself. When you’re tempted to make a “bad choice,” you think about that little notebook and it just might be the nudge you need to take your face out of the fridge. Disclaimer: I’m eating potato chips as I write this. And I don’t keep a food journal. But I know they work.
I do keep a running log. It helps that there’s an app for that. I never look back over my log, but keeping one makes me feel virtuous and accountable. It really does.
Lately, I started keeping a work log. (Ok, ok– today, I started a work log. But I started it.) My time drifts away as I toil on Twitter, focus on Facebook and write on WordPress. I lose complete track of time, work without stopping for hours, and at the end of the day, when someone says “what did you do today?” I numbly say “I don’t know.”
The solution I came up with is to take a break every couple of hours and make a few notes about what I accomplished before the break. Again, it makes me accountable. I have to pull something of value out of all the surfing I’ve just done. More important, I can have meaningful conversations at the end of the day.
So, aside from the fact that if you can’t hold a conversation, you aren’t likely to make it past the second date, what does all this have to do with dating?
Dare I suggest a little black book? Absolutely not, unless you’re seeing so many people at one time that you can’t keep them straight. What I am suggesting is that at the end of the day, or the week, write down what you did that could help you in your search for Mr. or Mrs. Right (or Right Now, for that matter).
Here are some examples of things you might write down in your what-I- did-for-dating diary:
- Worked out, and then, instead of walking around town all sweaty, I showered — looked good, felt good.
- Met friends, and friends of my friends, out on a weeknight. Casual and fun.
- Found a new place in the neighborhood for breakfast. Chatted with the server. Worth another visit, for sure.
Notice that none of these entries are about actual dates. They’re about feeling good, putting yourself out there, changing things up and having fun. All things that are a lot more fruitful than worrying about when and where you will find your next date. Live life and the dates will come.